By Keisha Dawn – Dallas South News Intern
Of all the roles that I play -daughter, older sister, writer, full time college student, DSN Intern- motherhood, being mommy to my four-year-old daughter is the one that matters most. Admittedly becoming a mother before marriage was not on my to do list. But it has been a relief knowing God has forgiven me even when I have failed to live up to his calling on my life. For his unfailing love, I promised to do the best job at raising my daughter that I possibly can…with His guidance of course.
Growing up in a family that was always in the church, it was a given that the tradition would continue with me. Not just to be present in the pews, but for the knowledge of God to be present at a young age. My relationship with God may not have kept me from all of my teenage and young adult woes, however, the Godly conscious placed in my psyche was compass that I could use as I navigated my way through life. It gave me another way out, and an alternative path the one others were taking.
Shouldn’t we as parents allow our children the same right; another way out? Why are we not giving our children the same opportunity today? Why are we forgetting about Sunday school and all the memories it brought? What about Vacation Bible School?
Before becoming Mommy, it was all about me. Where I went, how long I stayed and who I mingled with was my own concern. Although I attended church on a regular, it was no big deal if I was really involved or not. Things changed once I made the decision to jump the gun before the broom. It sure enough changed when I found myself having to completely raise another human being on my own. From that point I knew I couldn’t portray myself as I had. By all means, I now had someone watching my every move; even though God’s eyes were on me the whole time.
Dating, clubbing, cursing, and even jamming to the music I once knew all the words to had to cease. Tupac couldn’t hold stock in my CD player any more. R. Kelly had his own struggles so I let him be. From the way I dressed to the guys I dated, change was certain.
There are too many parents, both single and married who do their own thing with no regard for their children. If the character and lifestyle that we exhibited before having our children was negative, then we must turn it into a positive for the sake of our young ones. Our example must shine bright and parents must realize that we will have the greatest impact on who our children are to become, whether it’s good or bad.
None of it is easy. Combing hair, preparing meals, making sure the right size pantyhose fit her little legs, it’s all work (not to mention the extra sleep I could use). But I wouldn’t have it any other way. In order for my child to become a progressive adult, I feel being her true role model is what I need to work hardest on.
No, I’m not saying in order to raise a great person one has to be present at the church every time the doors open. But what does matter for those who portray their love for God, is allowing your child the chance to build a relationship with The One who gives them the future we so often talk about. After you’ve done your part, it will be up to them to carry the torch. We must at least provide them with the match to start the fire.
It doesn’t have to be dreary nor mind paralyzing. Church is not bad at all, even though when we were kids it sometimes seemed like drag. It’s all in how you perceive it. But blaming it on the inability to keep up with all the ruffles and sparkly pantyhose for the entire family is a cop out.
In our household, some days are casual while others are swagger filled Sundays. From color coordination to the denim down duo, I try to make a conscious effort to expose my child to spiritual settings so she will one day be able to make her own revelation about who God is.
Leading by example is the best way that I have to do that. Adding Sunday worship to my lifestyle and allowing my child to attend the best school in the world, Sunday school, is a great way to get her prepared for the world that’s waiting for her outside of my protective arms.
Keshia Dawn is a student at the University of Mary Hardin-Baylor and author of the novel His Grace, His Mercy. She can be reached at keshia@dallassouthnews.org
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